XLIS Primary Parent Talk in 2023

“Education is the most powerful weapon to change the world. You can use it to change the world.”

——Nelson Mandela

Different soils and growth environments can cultivate different flowers, and the same flower requires different nutrients at different stages of growth. In order to comprehensively understand the needs of every child in their growth and provide them with the most suitable educational support, the "Parent Talk" at Xi'an Liangjiatan International School has emerged at the right time. In March, we invited 8 parents of middle school students to share with everyone the growth difficulties and solutions faced by children who are about to enter puberty. So, what are the developmental characteristics of primary school students and how should parents provide targeted guidance in accordance with their children's growth patterns? In April, we welcomed 12 primary school parents to discuss their thoughts on parenting and valuable family education experiences with everyone.

Ms. Sandy Yao

P1 & P3 Parent

Topic: Lead Your Kid to Change the World

Ms. Sandy Yao has four children. Her eldest daughter is 18 years old and she is attending high school in the United States. Her youngest son is only four years old. When it comes to the education of four children, she first compared the differences between international schools and institutional schools from four aspects: teaching methods, the roles of teachers and parents, the cultivation of student’s English proficiency and critical thinking ability, and extracurricular activities. Based on her own experience, she explained the reasons for choosing international education firmly.

In addition, she also mentioned that the emergence of ChatGPT will inevitably bring new changes to the cultivation of future talents. So, when education is overturned, what abilities do our children need to cultivate again? In Sandy's opinion, creativity and problem-solving ability, interpersonal communication and communication ability, digital literacy and technical ability, and critical thinking ability are undoubtedly the necessary abilities for the new generation of global citizens to enter the world stage. These abilities will give them wings and lead them to be people who can change the world.

Ms. Yijie Chen

P3 Parent

Topic: Supporting Children’s 

Self-Management Skills

Ms. Yijie Chen is the mother of a P3 boy and emphasizes that cultivating children's self-management skills should start from two aspects - time management and social and emotional learning. In terms of time management, she advocates that parents should be "advisory" parents, providing necessary information support for their children, rather than directly making decisions for them. The focus is on awakening their children's self-directed and self-control abilities, cultivating their sense of control over life, guiding them to learn to cherish their own time while also learning to respect others' time.

In terms of social and emotional learning, Ms. Yijie Chen emphasized the importance of "peer effect" and "team spirit" in building good interpersonal relationships. Through the story of "Oak and Reed", she told everyone that in the process of social and emotional learning, it is first necessary to clarify what we can control and what we cannot control. Only by facing ourselves honestly can we gain the trust of our peers, thereby establishing healthy social and emotional relationships.

Ms. Mao Guo Smith

P2 Parent

Topic: Parenting as Mom-trepreneur

“Happiness is not something that others can give, but rather one's own subjective experience.” This is Ms. Smith's definition of happiness, based on which she believes that as parents, our mission is to help children find what they want. As an entrepreneur, Ms. Smith will permeate her son's daily life with the reasons why parents need to work, guide her child to establish awareness of life ideals and goals, cultivate endogenous motivation for self-driven growth, and learn to pursue deep levels of happiness. “There are many regrets in life, and we can just follow in the footsteps of our children and do it again,” Ms. Smith said. That's why lifelong learning becomes a lifelong lesson for parents. In the process of growing up with her children, she values the subtle influence of words and deeds on children and insists on letting them learn to observe the world with their own eyes, giving them the initiative, and giving them the opportunity to intern for their own lives!

Mr. Terren Maves

P2 & M2 Parent

Topic: My Experience as a Parent of Bilingual Children

Mr. Terren is from the United States, and his wife is Chinese. He has a lovely pair of mixed-ethnicity brothers. Cross-cultural international families naturally have the advantages of bilingual education, but how to stimulate children's interest in learning languages in family education is also a subject of study. Mr. Terren shared that due to the influence of his family environment, his eldest son Reagan was able to understand English from a young age, but because he lived in China, he initially resisted speaking English. Once, Terren brought his family back to the United States to meet their loved ones, and the strong language atmosphere opened Reagan's interest like a key. From then on, he not only fell in love with speaking English, but also became deeply fascinated by various English reading materials.

After the birth of his youngest son Russel, under the influence of his brother, he became accustomed to bilingual communication from a young age and also loved reading. Mr. Terren said that although the two brothers have vastly different personalities, the older brother is introverted and quiet, while the younger brother is lively and talkative, sharing "reading time" is a daily convention in this family of four. As a father, Terren always believes that whether it is a bilingual international family or a monolingual family, cultivating children's reading habits from a young age is the most effective way to gain a deeper understanding of a language.

Ms. Wendy Zhang

ECEB Parent

Topic: Practicing the IB Philosophy in Family Life

Ms. Wendy Zhang is a full-time mother who not only takes care of her two sons' daily lives, but also considers the issue of their family education as her responsibility. In her sharing, she elaborated on the importance of the IB education concept for the healthy growth and development of kindergarten children from multiple aspects, such as supporting their learners' dominant position, cultivating their reading habits, emphasizing sports and establishing a learning community. As a mother, she always maintains a consistent pace of learning with her children, constantly moving forward on the path of becoming an international diploma learner, and personally integrating IB education concepts into all aspects of family life.

Mr. Xulin He

P1 Parent

Topic: Stories from Earth’s History

What Mr. He brought was not so much a parenting sharing as a geography class presented to parents, which originated from a geography common sense that his daughter asked him one day after school. His sharing starts from two parts: Earth structure and biological interpretation, followed by in-depth thinking and exploration of the origin and evolution of life. His rich knowledge reserves and vivid narration have been repeatedly praised by the parents on site as greatly beneficial.

Ms. Rui Ma

P6 Parent

Topic: Growing Up with Your Child

Ms. Rui Ma shared her parenting experience with a comparison of her son Marvin's first day of school in 2015 and the two days before. Referring to her greatest experience in the past eight years of family education, she candidly stated that she should always prioritize the physical and mental health of her children and inspire their inner drive with respect and understanding. Later, she quoted the classic scene of a mother and daughter crossing the universe in this year's Oscar best film Everything Everywhere All at Once and told the parents on the scene that at any time, parents should give their children unconditional love and permanent support. At the end, Ms. Rui Ma invited three parents to come on stage and recited the American poet Khalil Gibran's prose poem "To the Child" in English, Chinese, and Korean. Parents were sincere, with their words flowing with the most sincere and simple love for their children, which moved many present listeners.

Ms. Ping Yu

P6 Parent

Topic: Growing Up with Your Children and be Lifelong Learners

Ms. Ping Yu's sharing revealed a point in parent-child relationships that is easily overlooked by parents, that is, the prerequisite for parents to educate their children is to first complete self-education and maintain self-improvement, in order to grow together with their children. She talked about how she fell in love with Xi'an Liangjiatan International School at first sight, how her children were ignited by IB education to learn, from the initial anxiety and confusion when encountering problems in family education, to keeping up with the pace of the school when conflicts arise, and finally letting the parents' suspended heart land smoothly. Every time a problem is solved, it not only allows her to see the quietly changing things happening in her child, but when she looks at herself, she also finds that she has made significant progress.

Ms. Qingyi Xie

P5 Parent

Topic: Self-management and Lifelong Learning

Even in the adult world, having stable emotions is a rare and precious quality, and in the growth process of teenagers, emotional fluctuations are inevitable. Learning to manage emotions is not an easy task, so what should parents do to help their children learn self-regulation? Ms. Qingyi Xie provides several practical suggestions for parents, including training their children's prefrontal cortex, helping them develop the habit of recording emotions, getting more exposure to nature, developing good eating and habits, and ensuring sufficient sleep. As for time management, she mentioned the most important point - please allow children to "procrastinate", cultivate their specific time concepts, adhere to the "5-minute principle", and provide new ideas for parents present to help their children grow into time managers.

Ms. Karina Bittencourt

P4 Parent

Topic: Family Experience on Education Searching for the Best Version of Ourselves

Ms. Karina Bittencourt and her family are from Brazil and have been living in Xi'an for 6 months. However, as her child successfully attends our school, she admits that this has helped them quickly adapt to their foreign life. Her parenting sharing starts from her own country Brazil and its cultural aspects which, in their case, were mixed with the learnings of more than six years living in Czech Republic where they also chose for an IB school. She also spoke about the simple desire of parents, no matter from which cultural background they might be, seek the best education for their children. As well as her understanding of good education which would have as a good starting point an alignment between family’s values and school’s philosophy. 

Mr. Kriss Parker

P2 & P6 Parent

Topic: Digital Devices for Kids

Mr. Kriss Parker, with the theme of "electronic products are a double-edged sword, guiding children to use them reasonably", analyzed the impact of electronic products on family life from multiple dimensions such as children's dependence on electronic products, potential risks in internet information, parents' requirements for children, and children's expectations for parents. This led to the core theme - what children truly want is not electronic products, but parents who can accompany them, and it is emphasized that parents should lead by example and set a good benchmark for their children in family education.

Ms. Hyojeong Kim

M1 & P5 Parent

Topic: Dream with Children

Ms. Hyojeong Kim, a Korean parent, introduced the concept of "appreciative inquiry" and shared her most valuable experiences in home education, including being brave enough to encourage children to explore and discover their interests, daring to dream, daring to set life goals, and having the determination to do everything possible to achieve their dreams. The world will make way for those with goals and foresight, "she always uses this sentence to motivate her son, and on the way to building dreams with her child, she is also constantly achieving herself.

I believe that the sincere and detailed sharing by parents will open a window for parents, help them summarize feasible experiences from commonalities, and bring them new perspectives and solutions. Our school's "Parent Talk" activity has come to a successful end this semester. We cherish every opportunity to communicate with parents and respect the individual needs of children's growth in different cultural backgrounds. In the future, we will actively organize various exchange activities to promote the linkage between family and school, striving to gain inspiration through exploration, find a way out through inspiration, enhance the cohesion between family and school, and promote the progress of family school education towards higher goals!

Sandy Yao 女士有四个孩子，大女儿已经18岁，在美国读高中，小儿子只有四岁。提到对四个孩子的教育，她首先从教学方式、教师家长分别承担的角色、对学生英语水平和思辨能力的培养及课余活动四个方面对比了国际学校和体制内学校的不同，根据自身经历讲述了坚定选择国际教育的理由。此外她还提到，Chat GPT的横空出世必然对未来人才的培养带来新的变革，那么当教育被颠覆后，我们的孩子需要重新培养哪些能力？在Sandy看来，创造力和解决问题的能力、人际交往和沟通能力、数字素养和技术能力和批判性思维能力无疑是未来新一代全球公民走向世界舞台必备的能力，这些能力会为他们插上翅膀，引领他们去做一个可以改变世界的人。

Yijie Chen 女士

小学三年级家长

主题：培养孩子的自我管理技能

Yijie Chen 女士是一个三年级男孩的妈妈，她强调培养孩子的自我管理技能应该从两方面入手——时间管理和社交情感学习。在时间管理方面，她倡导家长应当做“顾问型”的父母，为孩子提供必要的信息支持，而非直接为孩子做决定，重在唤醒孩子的自驱力和自控能力，培养孩子对生活的掌控感，引导孩子学会珍惜自己时间的同时也要学会尊重别人的时间。在社交情感学习方面，Yijie Chen 女士着重阐述了“同伴效应”和“团队精神”对建立良好人际关系的重要性，并通过“橡树和芦苇”的故事告诉大家，在社交情感学习过程中，首先要理清自己能掌控的事是什么，哪些又是我们无法掌控的，唯有坦诚面对自己，才能取得同伴的信任，从而建立健康、良性的社交情感关系。

Mao Guo Smith女士

小学二年级家长

主题：作为企业家妈妈的育儿之道

“幸福不是别人能给的，而是自己的主观体验。”这是Smith女士对幸福的定义，基于此她认为，作为父母我们的使命是帮助孩子寻找自己想要的东西。作为一名创业者和企业家，Smith女士会在日常生活中向儿子渗透父母为什么要工作，引导孩子树立人生理想和人生目标的意识，培养自驱成长的内生动力，从而学会追求深层次的幸福感。“人生有很多遗憾，刚好我们可以跟着孩子的脚步，再来一遍。”Smith女士说正因如此，终身学习才会成为为人父母一生的功课。在和孩子共同成长的过程中，她重视言传身教对孩子潜移默化的影响，并坚持让孩子学会用自己的眼睛去旁观世界，把主动权交给他们，赋予孩子为自己的人生实习的机会！

Terren Maves先生

小学二年级 & 中学二年级家长

主题：双语家庭的育儿经验

Terren 先生来自美国，妻子是中国人，拥有一对可爱的混血兄弟。跨文化国际家庭自然拥有着双语教育的优势，但是如何在家庭教育中激发孩子学习语言的兴趣，同样是一门学问。Terren 先生分享道，受家庭环境影响，大儿子Reagan从小就可以听懂英语，但因为生活在中国，所以最初他很抗拒说英语。一次，Terren 带全家回美国见亲人，浓厚的语言氛围像一把钥匙一样打开了Reagan的兴趣之门，从此他不仅喜欢上了说英语，也对各种英语读物深深着迷。等到小儿子Russel出生后，在哥哥的影响下，他从小就习惯用双语进行沟通交流，同时也热爱阅读。Terren 先生说，虽然这对兄弟的性格大相径庭，哥哥内敛安静，弟弟活泼健谈，但共享“阅读时光”是这个四口之家的每日约定，作为爸爸，Terren始终相信，无论是双语国际家庭还是单语家庭，从小培养孩子的阅读习惯都是深入了解一门语言最有效的途径。

Wendy Zhang 女士

幼儿园B班家长

主题：家庭生活中的IB理念实践

Wendy Zhang 女士是一名全职妈妈，除了照顾两个儿子的日常生活，她也将孩子的家庭教育问题视为己任。在分享中，她从支持孩子学习者的主体地位、培养孩子的阅读习惯、注重体育运动和建立学习型社区等多个方面阐述了国际文凭教育理念对幼儿园孩子健康成长和发展的重要性。而作为母亲，她也总是和孩子们保持一致的学习节奏，在成为国际文凭学习者这条路上始终步履不停，身体力行地将IB教育理念渗透在家庭生活的方方面面。

第二期

Xulin He 先生

小学一年级家长

主题：地球历史故事

何爸爸带来的与其说是一场育儿分享，更像是向家长们奉上的一节地理大课堂，而这源于某天女儿放学回家后向他提问的一个地理小常识。何爸爸的分享从地球构造和生物演绎两部分内容详细展开，之后对生命的起源和生命的演化进行深入思考和探讨。他丰厚的知识储备和生动的讲述令现场的家长们频频称赞，获益匪浅。

Rui Ma 女士

小学六年级家长

主题：和孩子一起成长

Rui Ma 女士用一张2015年儿子Marvin 第一天出门上学和前两天出门上学的背影对比图开启自己的育儿经验分享。提起过去八年在家庭教育过程中最大的心得，她坦言要永远把孩子的身心健康放在第一位以及用尊重和理解来激发孩子的内驱力。随后她引用今年奥斯卡最佳影片《瞬息全宇宙》中一对母女穿越宇宙冰释前嫌的经典场景告诉现场的家长们，无论何时，父母都要给予孩子无条件的爱和永远的支持。尾声，Rui Ma 女士分别邀请三位家长上台，用英中韩三语朗诵了美国诗人哈利勒·纪伯伦的散文诗《致孩子》。家长们情真意切，言语间流淌出对孩子们最真挚朴实的爱，令不少在场听众动容。

Ping Yu 女士

小学六年级家长

主题：终身学习，和孩子共同成长

Ping Yu 女士的分享揭示了亲子关系中容易被父母忽略的一点，即父母教育孩子的前提是先完成对自我的教育，并保持自我提升，才能和孩子共同成长。她从如何对西安梁家滩国际学校“一见钟情”谈到孩子怎样被IB教育点燃学习热情，从最初在家庭教育中遇到问题时的焦虑和不知所措谈到当矛盾产生时紧跟学校的节奏最终让父母悬着的一颗心平稳落地。每一次问题的解决不仅能让她看到孩子身上悄然发生的变化，反观自身，她发现自己同样收获了长足的进步。

Qingyi Xie女士

小学五年级家长

主题：自我管理，终身学习

即使在成人世界里，拥有稳定的情绪也是不可多得的珍贵品质，在青少年的成长过程中，情绪起伏不定更是在所难免。学会情绪管理并不是一件容易的事，那么家长该从哪些方面入手帮助孩子学会自我调节，Qingyi Xie女士为家长们提供了几条具有实操意义的建议，包括训练孩子的前额叶皮层、帮助孩子养成记录情绪的习惯、多去接触大自然、养成良好的饮食与习惯以及保证充足睡眠等。而关于时间管理，她提到了最重要的一点——请允许孩子“磨蹭”，培养孩子具体的时间概念，坚持“5分钟原则”，为在座的家长提供了帮助孩子成长为时间管理者的新思路。

Karina Bittencourt女士

小学四年级家长

主题：家庭教育理念经验分享 寻找最佳版本的自己

Karina Bittencourt女士一家来自巴西，在西安生活刚刚半年，随着孩子在我校顺利就读，她坦言这为他们快速适应异乡生活帮了不少忙。她的育儿分享从自己的国家巴西及其自带的文化背景为切入点，提到他们曾在捷克生活六年，那会儿他们就为孩子选择了国际文凭学校，并讲述了为人父母致力于为孩子寻求最好教育的朴素愿望，以及自己对于好的教育的理解——当家庭价值观和学校教育理念不谋而合，我们就拥有了一个良好的教育起点。

Kriss Parker先生

小学二年级 & 六年级家长

主题：引导孩子理性使用电子产品

Kriss Parker先生以“电子产品是把双刃剑，要引导孩子合理使用”为主题，从孩子对电子产品的依赖，互联网信息中的潜在风险、父母对孩子的要求和孩子对父母的期待等多个维度分析了电子产品对家庭生活的影响，进而引出核心主题——孩子真正想要的并不是电子产品，而是可以陪伴他们的父母，并强调在家庭教育中父母应该以身作则，为孩子树立良好的标杆。

Hyojeong Kim 女士

中学一年级 & 小学五年级家长

主题：和孩子一起筑梦

韩国家长Hyojeong Kim 女士从“欣赏式探究”这个概念引入主题，分享了自己在家庭教育中获得的最有价值的经验，包括勇于鼓励孩子去探索发现自己的兴趣爱好，敢于做梦，敢于确立人生目标，并要有为实现梦想拼尽全力的决心。“世界会向那些有目标和远见的人让路” ，她总是用这句话激励儿子，而在和孩子一起筑梦的路上，她也在不断成就着自己。

相信，爸爸妈妈们真诚详尽的分享会为家长们打开一扇窗，帮助家长们在共性中总结可行性经验，为他们带来全新的思考视角和解决路径。本学期我校的“家长讲堂”活动圆满结束，我们珍惜每一次和家长沟通的机会，尊重不同文化背景下孩子成长的个性需求。未来我们也会积极组织各种促进家校联动的交流活动，力求在探讨中收获启发，在启发中寻找出路，增强家校间的粘合度，推动家校共育向着更高的目标前进！

文章转载自：【XLIS 西安梁家滩国际学校】